Virtus Daily Blog #22 - What do you love to do?
One of my deep seated values is love.
As discussed in Daily Blog #22 , Love sits nicely in the middle of Excellence, Freedom, Awareness, Connection and Integrity.
Love is one of the most important ingredients required to live a meaningful existence. To love and to be loved is something that all humans should experience on a daily basis. Being capable of love, stems from our ability to be able to express the truest version of ourself, to be completely in tune with who we are and to be able to appreciate what we are and what we are becoming. I split love into two parts.
To love and to be loved.
To be Loved
Love for ourselves must come before love for others. The most important relationship you can ever have is the one with yourself, If you’re not content with who and what you are, you’ll project those insecurities onto your friends, family and potential partner. This is an increasingly difficult thing to do. As social media and dopamine dumps become more and more prevalent, teaching ourselves and others to love themselves has never been more important. Don’t get me wrong, social media can be a fantastic tool, but if we are not content with who and what we are, it can be an endless pit of despair. My suggestion; Spend time on you. Learn what makes you tick, what pain points you have, and how you respond to situations. Understand your motives, are they driven by your values, or driven by your ego. Be patient, self exploration and understanding are lifelong conquests. Just do your best in the meantime while you’re figuring it out.
The other side of the love coin is your ability to love others. I believe that once you love yourself, your capacity to love and give love to those around you is immense. Selfishness becomes obsolete because you are so invested in creating a world that other people can live and flourish in, that you no longer feel the need to take everything for yourself. You transcend the centre of your universe. For example I hear this sentiment repeated and explained consistently each time someone close to me has a baby. I believe this is because for once, you’re not the centre of your universe, you’re not the most important person in your life. Your child is.
Love (much like life) is hard, theres no guide book, each of us are unique when it comes to what makes us tick and how we receive and express love. What we should work hard to understand, is how different people give and receive love. Take the book The 5 Love Languages - Gary Chapman. The way we give love and the way we receive love can be split into 5 categories. Physical touch, Quality Time, Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service and Receiving gifts. I won’t dive deep into it now, but I’d recommend taking a deep dive and learning about your love language. Read the book and take the test.
I’m not going to let you leave without taking some action. Below is a 3 step process to creating, and experiencing more love in your life.
Write a list. Titled: 30 things that I love to do. Spend some time on it, think deeply about what truly lights you up, activities and experiences which truly set your soul on fire.
Share this list with someone you love.
Start ticking things off.
Here are 10 of my top 30 to help you get started.
Coffee time with friends
Hiking and camping
Spending time with KP.
Exploring the world.
Competing: Football, Business or Beer pong for examples.
Writing, reading and expressing.
Drinking Beer or GIN. with my favourite people.
Learning about the universe inside our heads and the one outside.
Helping others uncover and express their true purpose.
Jumping on trampolines
The most important things in this world are family, and love” John Maxwell